I wrote this post in my head from Sydney to Canberra tonight, while I had a good couple of hours to think about life, death and friendship.
I would say one of my greatest strengths is that I am loyal - it's one of my biggest weaknesses too. It means I often have pretty intense expectations of my friends, and the people around me. And when I say pretty intense that might be code for maybe unrealistic or unjustified? The only person I think who can out-loyal me is the dog of the yellow house and, well, I guess he isn't a person so doesn't really count. This means the over thinker in me sometimes wonders if I put too great a value on friendships - do I expect too much from my friends, am I hanging around my friends too much, am I a loser? Don't answer any of that, unless it is flattering and reaffirming.
But what brings me to think about all this? Today I paid my respects to a courageously brave woman, who fought a bloody good fight. I can't begin to tell you how amazing this woman was, in that she gave herself years of life - extra bonus years because she was strong and tenacious and was loved.
During the service there was a montage of wonderful photos - pictures of courtship, marriage, children, grandchildren and friends. Some of those photos came to life over a cup of tea, as I was introduced to a life long friend, a lady who featured in those photos taken all those years ago...a loyal friendship that had made their way through nearly 50 years of life by my count. And this lady, what struck me about this lady, was how she valued their friendship. I was introduced to this lady by my friend who had lost her mother, and this lady seemed glad I was there, because as she said - friends are important.
Driving home it struck me that one day I'll be that lady, or maybe my friend will be her - either way, one of us will look back at all those memories and think about our friendship. It made me sad for the now - for the lady and my friend and for everyone who was there today. It also made me sad for the future and the thought of that day for me or for her (or for you, you, you, or you).
At the same time it made think of all my wonderful friends, who have helped me stay sane, made me happy and stuck by me through stuff. I know which ones will be there looking at the bloody montage, and all I can say is you'd better pick good pictures.
And one day I'll be telling those who were too young to remember this day in detail, what an important thing loyalty and friendship is, and how they are lucky, because it's in their genes.
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